It was 4:30 AM when I awoke from a deep sleep today. Squinting, I slowly turned my head toward my window and noticed the smallest hint of blue light peeking through the early dawn sky. Without warning, worry enveloped my entire being like a dark gray cloud swallowing up soft rays of sunlight.
Feeling confused, disoriented, and a bit sad, I pulled my warm blankets underneath my chin to insulate my body from the morning chill. What exactly was nagging at my subconscious? It seemed I was having a full-on emotional response to an unmasked concern. Yet, in my sleepy haze, I could not fully understand the source of my anxiety.
After a few moments, clarity replaced perplexity.
The disturbing details of the dream I had just awakened from, played out in my mind like a high definition movie. Suppressed fear and uneasiness rose to the surface and finally, overflowed. Hot tears rapidly traveled from the corners of my eyes to my earlobes. Sniffles followed, then sobs.
I was having a serious meltdown at the crack of dawn. What in the world?
It took a while to gain my bearings. Even then, the sinister details of an all-too-real nightmare haunted me. I prayed, but the shadowy monster of fear continued lurking.
A few hours later, I called my dad, Joseph. Thankfully, God used him to help me decipher the meaning of what I dreamt. By the time I hung up the phone, faith replaced fear; worship replaced worry; and thanksgiving replaced any misgivings I had.
I now understand that my dream acted as a shovel to excavate my latent worries. You see, buried deep within me were lingering questions and uncertainties that needed to be addressed. The acknowledgment of their presence in my heart and mind was necessary before I could seek refuge in the God of my salvation. Once unearthed, I could see my issues clearly and lay them at the feet of Jesus.
God spoke to me during my time of devotion today and said, "You cannot submit what you have suppressed, to me."
That was a powerful revelation for me. And I believe this is the word we all should drink from our cup of inspiration today. Before we can take our burdens to the Lord, we must admit that we are indeed burdened. We cannot suppress our issues. We must submit them to God.
Sometimes, God will use a dream, memory, conversation, confrontation, or something else, to reach deep within our souls, and pull out what is hidden. This occurs so we can do what 1 Peter 5:7 tells us: "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."
God does not want us to drag our burdens and issues around, because they are too heavy for us. That's why Christ, our burden-bearer, says in Matthew 11:28, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."
My mom often sings a song called "I Must Tell Jesus," written by Elisha A. Hoffman in 1893. It says:
I must tell Jesus all of my trials/I cannot bear these burdens alone/In my distress He kindly will help me/He ever loves and cares for His own
TODAY'S PRAYER: God, when I go through hardship, I don't always know how to process the struggle. Sometimes, even though I am not consciously aware of it, fear, worry, and anxiety take up residence in my heart. When this happens Lord, please reveal my hidden struggles, and help me carry my burdens to You. For, You are the only one strong enough to handle my situation. In Jesus' name, Amen.
